11 Days From a New Life.

     My emotions at this moment, are fine; I feel normal. When I debated moving before, then decided not to, I thought it'd be hard for me, that I'd be very sad, scared, something, yet.... I'm just like always right now. I've seen through some of my actions and words that I'm stressed, I don't feel stressed, but I'll randomly go off on someone etc, and I don't know why. In 10 days, this will all change, I'll be confronted with the faces of those that have meant so much to me for years. Some for 19 years, some for 3 years, and all the same, I'll have to say bye to a safe and comfortable place in my life.
     There are things about here I won't miss, like the daily reminder of how many people are dying on the roads, my manager, and people slowing down when it rains. There's so much more that I will miss though. The amazing weather, the massive men at the gym that wait for me to finish my DL so they can give me a hug, the lake right outside my house, the warm sound of the interstate that puts me to sleep, seeing someone at the gas station I know, dancing, knowing the lay out of my grocery stores, cheap gas, pumping my own gas, family... I don't know what to look forward to there quite yet, except the friendliness of the people, and the ability to walk where I want to go, but I know that everything has fallen into place for this move to happen, which means there's something good waiting for me on the other side.
     I once worried about lack of income, loneliness, being forgotten, and just being ignorant, having to relearn how to get places, what things were, all the stuff that you learn after being somewhere. However now, I'm at peace that income will be there, friends will be found, those that need to will remember me, and I'll quickly become accustomed to where I am, and where I'm going. I think of this year as an adventure, an experiment, and a toe dipped in the water of independence. A fair portion of my life I've felt as though I skipped and missed out on my chance to be a teenager, yet I don't like to be thought of as one, and I choose to make my decision as though I'm not one. This is exactly where I am now; I'm almost 19, I'm not out of school, yet I'm leaving school, family, comfortability, and safety to go be my own person.
     Sure, I'm my own person now, I pay for my training, my gyms, my extra food, my hair cuts, but nothing large. I often think to myself, if I were given the chance to succeed, I would. Because I want to. This comes to mind in my work. When I get cut at work after an hour, I wasn't ever given the chance to make money, please customers, and enjoy the company of strangers. However when I am given the opportunity to work, people get the chance to enjoy conversation that doesn't remind them they've had a bad day, I'm given the chance to succeed, and I do.
     This next week, while the first half looks excruciatingly boring to me, it won't go slowly, and before I blink, I'll be across the country, with a new job, no parents around, going through the same learning experience I did at 17, on a larger scale. I have back up if I fail financially, I have friends 1.5 hours away that love me, and I have the ability to talk to those at home. Gotta love technology! This coming week, I'll spend some time with my mom, doing what she likes to do; going to the salon. I'll have a friend from BB.com come to meet me from Atlanta, I'll pack electronics, I'll pack my beloved kitchen, I'll pick up a moving truck, say bye to my washer and dryer, train my heart out, dance till I die, watch my life go into a moving truck, and clean more than I ever want to.